True story. One day I was in a park doing tai chi with a friend and a fellow approached. After watching for a while he said, in a British accent, “Hello Mr. Guru”. I said hi back, and asked him his name. He said “Philip Michael. You don’t need to tell me your name, though, because it doesn’t matter. You remind me of a big monkey. I’m going to call you Monkey Sensei. Will you be my mentor?”
What could I say? Naturally I accepted.
I swear to god this actually happened.